Stop! That! Train!

DeeDee (Jujubee, 'Drag House Rules') and Tess (Ginger Minj, "Hocus Pocus 2") have been besties since attending the Train Hostess Academy together but dream of something better than the dismal Stank Rail outfit they work for. When the hyper elegant Glamazonian Express is suddenly in need of hostesses, they fashion new uniforms and get on board. But while they contend with their mean girl classmates, now First Class hostesses Amber (Brock Hayhoe, 'Canada's Drag Race'), Alli (Marcia Marcia Marcia, 'RuPaul's Drag Race') and Ayshleiygh (Symone, "Bros"), what they don't know is that they're heading into a Stormaganza and must "Stop! That! Train!"

Laura's Review: B-

I don't know about you, but the idea of a film being produced from the world of 'RuPaul's Drag Race' feels like just what we need right now and while 'Grimsburg' writers Christina Friel & Connor Wright never reach the comedic heights achieved by "Airplane!'s" Zucker, Abrahams and Zucker, director Adam Shankman ("Bringing Down the House") and his fabulous cast deliver good-natured goofery.

No sooner are they on board than DeeDee realizes that Cal (Brian Jordan Alvarez, "M3GAN"), the specialty magazine winner of a salacious desire to see his privates, is this train's engineer, the beginning of an onboard romance. Cal is paired in the cockpit with Conductor Davenport (SNL's Chris Parnell), who does a Peter Graves riff sharing inappropriate information over the train's loudspeaker. First Class looks like a day spa, its predominant color pink, the locomotive's roof giving the moving train the impression of a hot pink streak shooting through the landscape.

While DeeDee and Tess enthusiastically greet passengers, the gauntlet is thrown by Amber, Alli and Ayshleiygh when they turn the departing safety instruction ritual into a vogue battle, overwhelming the two newbies. Meanwhile, over at U.S. Train Headquarters, Donna Dusk (Rachel Bloom, "The Devil Wears Prada 2") is tracking the convergence of several major storms which the Glamazonian is headed straight into. Her warnings are ignored by her sexist male counterparts, so she sends a secret video message to a Glamazonian monitor Tess happens to be watching. But by the time Tess and DeeDee realize just what they're up against, the conductor announces their brakes are fried, then promptly gets bitten by a child's escaped pet scorpion. As DeeDee and Cal try to figure out how to stop the train which is headed straight for a nuclear reactor site, a hotel for dogs and the home of beloved Broadway star Laurie Metcalf(!), Tess attempts to calm passengers.

And those passengers are a handful. A famous actress (Sarah Michelle Gellar) continually fails to be recognized beginning with the rich gay guy (Drew Droege) who informs her she is in his window seat. A celebrating divorcee (Missi Pyle) looking for a hookup hits on every man in sight, ending up with the comatose conductor. And a child hating businessman ('Modern Family's' Jesse Tyler Ferguson) will be seated across from a woman (Mayan Lopez) about to give birth. But when Tess throws a disco party as a distraction, winning over Alli and Ayshleiygh much to Amber's dismay,  a rift forms between her and DeeDee. And DeeDee's already dealing with how to tell Cal she loves him before he sets off on a suicide mission, an amusing fantasy montage that just might not be that fantastical.

Of course this looming disaster makes it all the way to the Oval Office presided over by President Gagwell (RuPaul), who has her own past traumatic train experience to deal with. Fortunately she has her Press Secretary ("Fire Island's" Matt Rogers) around to 'give it to her straight' before 'giving it to her gay.'

Production design is fun from the 'Thomas the Tank Engine' inspired alert system at Train HQ to the haunted mine rail the Glamazonian is rerouted onto. Costume design contrasts the drab Stank Rail uniforms with the beautifully tailored pink suits of the Glamazonian. Minj and Jujubee play things hilariously straight. Alvarez plays things hilariously cluelessly. Matt Rogers steals every scene he's in. The film also features Latrice Royal as Barbra who keeps popping up in multiple different jobs. There are cameos galore including Charo, Jerry O'Connell, Joel McHale, Nicole Richie, Riki Lindhome, Lisa Rinna and Raven-Symoné.

Not all the jokes work in "Stop! That! Train!" but the film is so joyful you can't help but smile through one disaster after another. Drag queens are good for the spirits.

Robin's Review: C+

DeeDee (Jujubee) and Tess (Ginger Minj) are BFF stewardesses on a bargain train line, but want more. They sneak onto Glamazonian Express posing as posh stews and they, and all on board, are headed for a massive Stormaganza. The girls must work with the snooty first class attendants to "Stop! That! Train!"

This amiable drag queen goof is a comic disaster flick but, really, it is just, to put it nicely, homage to the "Airplane! (1980)" flicks. The story, by Christina Friel and Connor Wright, and directed by Adam Shankman, has a lot of heart but there is one important (well, three) ingredient missing – Jim Abrahams, David Zucker and Jerry Zucker, those same guys that brought us the 80's fun franchises.

There is a definite niche audience that will enjoy the overtly gay humor in what is "Airplane!" and "Naked Gun" brand of comedy. I am not familiar with "Ru Paul's Drag Race" but, watching "Stop!" I get the idea that many of the players were participants in that show – just a hunch. With them are a goofy bunch of cameos by Charo (remember her? She was  bandleader Xavier Cugat's main squeeze back in the 60s and 70s), Sarah Michelle Geller (famously as "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" the TV series (1997-2003) and not "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" the movie (1992)), Nicole Richie (of Paris Hilton fame), and Joel McHale.

For me, there were a few chuckles, not a single guffaw, an occasional smile but, mostly, a straight face. If we could bring back Zucker, Abrahams and Zucker one last time, Ru Paul Charles (producer and playing President Gagwell)) and her crew might have had something a lot better. But, as I said, its heart is in the right place.

Bleecker Street releases "Stop! That! Train!" in theaters on 6/12/26.